Woman who Fucked Around set to Find the Hell Out, says Senate

With the rumours that Sen. Susan Collins and Sen. Joe Manchin are set to vote against confirming Neera Tandem as the head of the Office of Management & Budget, the American people are set to claw their first win out of the Biden Administration.

Woman who Fucked Around set to Find the Hell Out, says Senate

The head of the Centre for American Bootlicking, who, politically speaking, fucked around more than a Gen 1 ditto at a day care centre, is set finally find the hell out. This comes as the Senate is expected to vote against her confirmation as the head of the Office of Management & Budget, in what Buddhists are calling the "Karmic event of the century."

The news comes after close associates of Sen. Susan Collins (R-Maine), and Sen. Joe Manchin (D(kinda)-West Virginia) himself, said the two won't vote to confirm Tanden.

"There's so much cruelty and unfairness in the world, right now," said a staffer of the ultra-centrist, GOP-fetishist Joe Manchin, "people working hard for something, and not getting what they deserve," he continued. "Thank goodness then for this good fucking news."

"The last person on Earth that deserves a huge promotion is Neera Tanden, what with the insane amount of toxic, bat shit, crazy vitriol she's thrown at leftists, Bernie Sanders especially, and his supporters, over the years. People who just want to make the world a better place. People who didn't deserve it. And that's coming from me, a Joe Manchin staffer - nobody hates leftists more than I do. Except Neera Tanden."

But it wasn't just D.C. insiders that had something to say about the outcome of the Tanden vote. "With the economy as it is, the pandemic ripping society apart," said Sarah, an independent Wisconsin voter, "all I'm surviving on, all that's keeping my alive right now is Schadenfreude. And thanks to this vote, I think I'm immortal."

A noted critic of the expansion of socialist programs, Ms. Tanden has been called a hypocrite by some colleagues "She's used public programs & services more than almost anybody I know. We had to call the Fire Department for her over 17 times in the last couple years alone, to try and pull her head out after getting stuck all the way up in Hillary Clinton's ass."

A noted part of Ms. Tanden's confirmation hearing was when Sen. John Kennedy (R)-Louisiana questioned her on her extreme hostility to progressives over the years, stating that she'd called Bernie Sanders "everything but an ignorant slut". If she fails to secure this position, close aides have suggested Ms. Tanden is set to apply for head of The Plastics from Mean Girls, opting to replace her now-stripped-bare twitter account with the burn book.