The first NFL game of the 2020 season kicked off on Thursday night between the Kansas City Chiefs and the Houston Texans. Yet, the conservatives of America kept their unbroken, perfect season-record of being totally lecherous pieces of shit going at the game, when supporters in the stands booed a moment of 'racial unity' between players.

Yelling out "boo", "Trump 2020", and other loudly echoed phrases to let the local population know their virginity was firmly intact, the posse carried out their disturbing protests when players of both teams linked arms in a show of solidarity, after the anthem.

But it didn't stop there; some of the skin-head Trumpers were apparently looking for a Monster Energy guzzling friend of theirs, having their hands stretched flat and extended in the air (presumably to indicate his height), shouting "Seen Kyle?!"

Kyle was later found to be safe though, being discovered next to a destroyed section of plaster-wall in the bathroom. He was fined for the damage, after a warning by police, "you just can't do that to a good white man's property. I know how you feel - like how seeing those linked players out there makes you want to break 'em. Put 'em down. But you can't just damage that white man's things. Now, had it been your wife, I would have understood."

But indeed, despite national, repeated condemnation, the foolishness of Trump supporters continues. Despite football players spending years bashing their heads together in helmets, it's these idiots in red caps who have scrambled egg for brains. White supremacists who consistently think they're genetically superior to every POC on Earth, despite the fact that they look like the missing link between Homo erectus and a Peter Jackson extra. Or rather, Homo erectus and Homo phobia. And they, who follow no rules, believe they have the right to lecture the oppressed on what protests are and aren't morally lawful.

"You look at the state of the civil rights movement now," chimed in one such crowd-yeller, "and it's awful. Your ancestors never protested like this. You know, when we owned 'em."

"They're bad role models. How can you expect them to take care of a community, when theyz can't even take care of their own family? I wanted to take care of my sister so much I married her. Now my nephew-son has a solid role model in his (sort of) father, and lives a good life foraging for possum hides along with his sister-cousin."

With a hugely important set of elections coming this November, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi addressed reporters on the issue: "I think it's clear that the world right now is an absolute hellscape. Only government has the power to move mountains against the problems we face, and change things. And so, to all the POC out there, I promise that if you put the Democrats in office, we will fight tooth and nail to make sure we are all suffering in our country, equally."

Vice President Biden, desperate to win over as many voters to the ballot box as electorally possible, to try and clinch the most important election in a century, said "It is my pledge, as the former deputy of the first black president, to be seen to be doing everything I can, to help our People Of Colour, in this time of great crisis. Not that I will actually do anything meaningful to help, but I will be seen to be doing it. God bless America."


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